One of the unintended consequences of liberating Iraq’s Shiite population is the daily Anti-American protest. As soldiers give way to politicians, the situation is decaying into a cesspool of absurdity: Chief U.N. weapons inspector Hans Blix wants to return to Iraq to supervise the demolition of weapons of mass destruction which he claims don’t exist.

When the tobacco industry agreed to pay $200 billion to the states in return for immunity against further litigation, someone forgot to tell the lawyers. An Illinois judge awarded $11 billion to plaintiffs who thought that light cigarettes only gave you attenuated cases of cancer or emphysema. Next will be an award for smokers who cut their fingers opening the carton or got that nasty cellophane wrapper lodged in their gums.